Please, no more!

Are you one of the people who have been given free advices when you least expect them? Are you one of those people who roll their eyes when you hear the word “advice”? Then read on.

I must say I have been really unfortunate with advices. I hate taking or giving advices. I am good at neither.

I am quite flabbergasted even if actually asked to advice on something. "What do you think?" has me thinking, why do you want to know! I prefer to keep to myself than interfere and give an advice unasked for. So, it is absolutely irritating when people just throw “pieces” of advice here and there for me to catch!

I know I sound irritated. I always get annoyed when there are some who believe in stereotyping and are judgmental and think that people are always looking for advice. When you go shopping for clothes in a mall, you find your favorite color tee-shirt and reach out for it. And some passerby advices you, “You should be getting something of a lighter shade you know”! Well, how would you feel?

In the least expected situations and places I have heard advices, which have been least helpful to me! In the make-up counter, I wanted a brown lipstick. I got tired of shooing away the sales assistant. I gave up and took the advice of the sales assistant against my instinct (my instinct works at stupid times) and bought a red one. “It is more flattering,” she said. Will I wear it ever now? No. That’s not my cup of tea or tube of lipstick!!

Hah! This was a good one. I finished college. And I chose my path of career. And there were people asking me explanation for my choice and giving advices - “Actually, you should have asked me before you made your choice!” “You should choose to do this and not waste your time doing that.” “There is no money in this field. So, do like this.” (Instead of giving advices, you could have got me the job!) “I can only advice you. Rest you have to figure out.” Thanks!

I know a friend who has a beautiful child. But he is not according to the modern standards of slim and cute. He is more of a “healthier” cute. (I even hate putting healthier within quotes!) There are people who randomly give her advice on what she should be doing to make her child look “average,” for his own future well-being. It’s a pity! The child is so happy and content and could not be bothered about anything but his toys and his imaginary world. The mom knows he is healthy. Its a crime to have a few extra pounds. I know this from my own personal experience. People feel free to poke you with advices, thinking you are well insulated from hurt just because you have the extra fat!

I understand that we seek advice when we can’t think for ourselves or want to hear other people’s perspectives. It feels better to hear others' opinions at times, to clear a foggy brain. I of course wait to hear what my family and a good close-knit group of friends (who really know me) have to say. At times, it is easier to take someone else’s advice because we might not always be right about ourselves or things. When the advice stems from a deep-seated concern and is heartfelt, it is worth giving an ear. You can always see when it is genuine. You never know, good might come out of it!

But, if you are a person I met on a train some day and are assuming I want your advice, please, no more!!